So, remember how I said that even though I wasn't particularly fussed on Edward Cullen and his nauseous little face, I was still going to give the Twilight books a go, because I want to know what all the fuss is about? Well I'm currently reading the first book and I have to say it is quite readable. It hasn't changed my life or anything, but it definitely hasn't been a chore to read. I still think it's massively overrated though. Maybe it's because I'm 22, not 15, or maybe it's because I'm massively cynical about love and romance in general, but I do think that Edward and Bella's relationship, right from the get-go is completely ridiculous and weird. And Bella is really f***ing annoying. I can't see how any teenage girls could relate to her, she's a nob. But yeah, I'm enjoying it...
Anyway, I was reading it on the bus the other day, and I got to the part where Edward and Bella go on a little trip to the woods (as you do) and she describes what he's wearing, and I suddenly read a sentence that made me pause and question Stephenie Meyer as a credible human living in the 21st century;
"His white shirt was sleeveless, and he wore it unbuttoned, so that the smooth white skin of his throat flowed uninterrupted over the marble contours of his chest,"
Does anyone else see the problem here? No seventeen year old boy, regardless of whether or not he happens to be a vampire, would go gallavanting around in an unbuttoned sleeveless shirt. I can't even imagine what that would look like, because nobody would EVER wear it. I'm not even talking about fashion here - they live in a small town, there probably isn't much in the way of reputable fashion stores, that's fine, I accept that. But unless the only store in a one hundred mile radius is the Jean Paul Gaultier Sailor Suit Cast Offs Store, there is no excuse for Edward wearing that shirt. No excuse. Stephenie Meyer, I don't know what kind of weird-ass, sartorially challenged world you're dreaming up, but you need to sort it out. Sure, the whole Twilight 'world' is full of mythical creatures (vampires, werewolves, Dakota Fanning) so obviously, we don't have to see it as completely realistic, but Steph, please at least try and be credible with the stuff that you actually can be credible with.
I feel like Carrie in that episode of SATC where Burger writes about the woman wearing a scrunchie. But at least some people actually own scrunchies.
No. Just no.